|
Online Christian Dating: Likes and Dislikes
Dave Pipitone
Online Christian dating is a convenient way to discover people who are interested in a meaningful Christian relationship that can result in lifetime friendship and marriage. Like all new relationships, Christian dating has its share of joys and frustrations. Each new relationship is a chance to develop a good friend. After the initial thrill of meeting someone new and seeming to connect, is it guaranteed to last?
Internet dating makes it easy for you to think you've found Mr. or Ms. Right at the very start of your dating conversation. That person seem to have "enough" of what you are when you ready his or her profile or gaze at her or his photo. However, if you choose someone who is not compatible with your expectations, beliefs and values, communication will break down, and all of the time and energy you've put into the relationship will end in frustration.
Fortunately, there are many different and interesting Christian singles who are available, willing and ready to enter into a relationship. So, your task is to get ready too. You do this by making a "shopping list" or what Dr. Neil Clark Warren of e-Harmony.com calls "Must Haves and Can't Stands." Reflect on past relationships that you have had. Observe other people's relationships and identify what traits catch your attention. Then, make two lists. One list contains the ten most valued qualities you want to find in a partner.
Examples might include friendliness, kindness, a sense of humor, patience, quick to serve, intelligent, romantic... and so on. Do you like to go out or do you like to stay in? Do you want to be with someone who spends most of her time with you? Or someone who likes to socialize with a lot of people. Look at your own needs that you have in a relationship and write down a profile of the person you would like to spend time with.
It is just as important to make a list of the top ten preferences that you don't want to be around. This may include physical behaviors as well as emotional qualities or attitudes. For example, smoking may be a taboo for you, but not for others. You might not be attracted to someone who is involved in only church activities and doesn't like dancing or outdoor pursuits. When you have written your lists of what you desire and what you don't want, you are closer to communicating your preferences and obtaining a person who matches your expectations.
Once you have a list of wants and dislikes, you can use the built in functions of a Christian dating website to sort through interested matches and other can consider you. The first step of Internet dating is getting to know another person. When you examine your preferences and those of another person, you can begin with a deeper understanding of the person you have met.
If there are serious incompatibilities, you can be disciplined about your wants without compromising what you value. You don't have to rush into a friendship knowing that there are potential conflicts that could damage your relationship. The best rule is not to start what you know you will not be able to finish. This means being true to yourself and trusting that there is a perfect person out there for you.
There is a temptation to short change yourself in the online Christian dating process. If you are willing to be patient and prudent, and trust the sorting process, God will lead you. You don't have to "settle" on someone who is not right for you.
|
More Articles on Christian Online Dating
Christian Internet Dating and You
Four Musts of a Christian Dating Single Site
Five Tips for Christian Dating Online
What a Christian Dating Site is All About
|
